Many people view therapy through the lens that something is wrong. I think we often default to this line of thinking because many people will not consider therapy until they are very uncomfortable. How often has life been going well for you; you’re happy in love, like your job, and everything seems to be aligning and you think, I need to go to therapy! Probably never. Humans typically need to become very uncomfortable before we are willing to change (such as go to therapy) but that does not mean that therapy is a bad thing, that your life is going poorly, or that something is wrong with you. I strongly disagree with this perspective and challenge everyone to look at therapy as a good thing. Yes, you heard that right: therapy is a good thing.
4 reasons therapy means something is going right:
- You care about how you feel: Maybe you struggle with episodes of depression, anxiety, or overthinking. Whatever the symptom is, you are uncomfortable and want to feel better. Whether this is on the conscious or subconscious level, it means you’re starting to realize that you deserve to feel better. This is a sign of self-love.
- You have gained insight and awareness: You cannot fix something you have not acknowledged exists. You have gained some insight and awareness that something is not working well in your life and you want to work on it because it matters to you. This could be marital issues, unhappiness in your work, challenges communicating, and many more. This is proof that a part of you, even if it is a very small part of you, has grown because you recognize that something needs to change.
- You are ready to be vulnerable: As Brene Brown has said many times, vulnerability is uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure, and is not a measure of weakness but an act of strength and courage. Therapy requires vulnerability on so many levels. To open yourself up to another and share information that you may have never shared with anyone is one of the bravest acts I witness as a therapist. This is true strength.
- You want to be a better human: You want to be a better parent, spouse, friend, boss, etc. Sometimes how we interact with others is what brings us into therapy. You may have communication issues with your spouse, work colleagues, children, and many others. This shows that you want to have healthier relationships and show up better for those you care about and must interact with regularly. This is a sign of growth and humility.
I hope we can begin to shift the narrative around therapy and recognize the strength, courage, and bravery it takes to make this decision. When we begin to heal, we in turn reduce the pain we inflict on others. Therapy is not only an act of self-love but an act of caring about others. Therapy does not mean something is going wrong; it means something is going right.